Again.

Lincoln is sick. Again. Really, he always is. It just gets better and worse, but never goes away. He either has a cough, a bad cough, or a cough that makes strangers look at me and wonder why he is not hospitalized. That is where we are at right now. We took him to church for the first time in three weeks on Sunday. By Wednesday, he was getting worse. This happens every single time we take him to church. I think we will really have to keep him home during cold and flu season.

I always think about how easy my life is compared to others. People starving in third world countries, people devastated by natural disasters. Even many people very close to me who have lost loved ones or dealt with extremely difficult trials. I wonder when it is my turn? What horrible thing is going to happen to me?

Having a chronically ill child is not easy. I know that he is not as ill as some children. But he is still very sick a lot of the time. It's hard. It's not taking care of him that is hard. It's the emotional turmoil of it. It's looking at his sweet little face with his sunken eyes pleading with me to help him feel better. It's wondering if I should take him to the doctor (again), if I am overreacting, if I need to increase his inhaler dosages. It's laying in bed crying, listening to him cough all night long, knowing there is nothing I can do, knowing how miserable he is. It's overwhelming. And it makes me sad. So maybe this is one of my trials in life. It's definitely one of his. :(
Here he is this morning...not in time out. Just wanting to be close to me while I cleaned the kitchen, but not having the energy to do anymore than plop himself down on the floor.